How I Finally Found Love When I Pulled the Plug on Relationships

I Finally Found Love When I Pulled the Plug on Relationships

 

You may think that “pulling the plug on relationships” is a little drastic, and maybe it is to most people.

 

But it’s what I did, and I lived to tell the tale. Actually, I more than lived; I prospered. Pulling the plug is what saved me.

 

Today … I have the man of my dreams at my side. He loves me for me, he dotes on me, and we’ve been together for several years. Every day, I feel like I love him more, and I know, I know, that sounds so stupid and cliché, but ladies, once you’ve experienced it, you know it’s not cliché.

 

It’s real.

 

Let’s Start at the Beginning

 

I’m sitting alone in my car in a middle school parking lot. It’s a Saturday afternoon in spring, and I distinctly remember uncomfortably shifting in my seat because of this annoying extra flab that had developed on either side of my upper back. That’s where I gain weight, and I was in a Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup phase. I’d gained about 10 pounds in a month or two.

 

So, I’m sitting there staring at gross piles of snow, waiting. I’m waiting for a call on my cell.

 

The night before, I had been up late in bed texting back and forth with my ex, Jason, telling him how bad I had gotten … how upset I was after the terrible breakup we’d had. It’d been several weeks, and I regretted everything I had done, I wanted him back … needed him back I said.

 

He couldn’t talk right then, so he told me he’d call me the next day after he got out of work.

 

I was living with my older brother and his wife (I know …) at the time; I’d moved out of Jason’s house after the breakup.

 

I didn’t want my brother or his wife to hear our conversation: thus, the middle school parking lot.

 

Sitting there in my sweats, greasy hair, bags under my eyes from not sleeping, peanut butter cup wrappers on the floor, an empty Big Gulp next to me, I felt positively awful — the worst I ever had in my life. I missed Jason so much. I wanted him back so badly, and I was deathly afraid that everything was against me. I had hit bottom, but I still had a little hope.

 

Then it got worse.

 

I waited for Jason to call, and he didn’t. I waited and waited, and finally, I decided to call him.

 

It rang several times, then someone picked up. Someone was talking away from the phone with someone else, muffled voices, and finally, a voice came on. A woman’s voice.

 

“Don’t call here,” she said. “Jason has a new girlfriend, and he does NOT want to talk to you. Stop calling. Get a life.”

 

I was stunned. Tears instantly began to flood out of my eyes.

 

Then it got worse … again.

 

I realized I knew the voice.

 

A co-worker at Jason’s office. Someone I had seen and even spent time with. Someone who I had — in passing —suspected of having had a crush on Jason. And whose phone number (after some digging) I’d seen pop up on his phone when he’d left it in the other room.

 

You can only imagine what happened after that.

 

I was totally defeated. Not only had that entire relationship been a lie, but Jason had been the relationship that was supposed to be my saving grace. Before him, I had been with another guy for two years … who had also cheated.

 

I had absolutely no faith in men or relationships. Twice … my only two long-term relationships had ended in shambles. Cheated on twice, I had been left with almost zero self-esteem.

 

For a while, I went into a deep depression.

 

Several weeks passed, and I did almost nothing. When I wasn’t dragging myself to work and doing the bare minimum, I stayed in bed, watching TV.

 

Finally, one Saturday morning about six weeks after that fateful day, I heard a gentle knock on my door. I was still living with my brother and his wife, trying not to bother them but not really thinking about when I would move out or about my future. When you’re that far gone, you can basically only take it a day at a time.

 

I said come in, and my sister-in-law Amy poked her head around the door.

 

“Hi,” she said softly. I was lying in bed, and she came and sat next to me. “How are you doing?”

 

Not wanting to alarm her, I feigned I’d had a headache, blah blah, blah, but she saw right through me. She said she’d been watching what I was going through and she had something she wanted to tell me.

 

“You didn’t know me before I met your brother, but I was actually where you are right now only about three months before we met and he introduced me to you and your family. Did you know that?”

 

I had not. Amy had always seemed so put-together and in control. Almost annoyingly so. I told her I hadn’t.

 

“I was,” she continued. “I’d just been cheated on and had my heart broken, but I did something kind of weird to get out of it.”

 

She told me that a friend of hers had given her the advice of trying to “forget men … and relationships … completely.” At first, she thought it was stupid, but she said she did a little searching online and found that this was a way that a lot of women finally found their way out of depression after multiple relationship failures like she had been through.

 

She told me that she took the advice. And once she totally dropped the idea of men and relationships altogether and focused on herself, she felt instantly better.

 

She started hanging out with friends and family more. She focused on her health and her career. And she focused on boosting her own self-regard and self-confidence.

 

And she said almost two months after that, she met my brother at a hockey game.

 

What she said, hit me hard. All I’d ever, ever considered was how I could get Jason back or how I could make him jealous … or find someone even better to throw in his face. I’d never thought of forgetting love altogether.

 

So, I did it.

 

And when I did? Everything changed just like Amy had said.

 

I did a little searching of my own, in fact. Amy’s advice was helpful, but I needed something more concrete to build myself back up if I was really going to get out of my rut. In the end, I used a course to get my confidence back, and it worked wonders. If you want to try it, it honestly truly saved me. It’s called the Gorgeous Course, and it helped me to redefine how I see myself and put all my energy and focus on me and my dreams. It has some truly amazing advice that totally changed my mindset in it. I attribute my success to Amy … and to that course.

 

Not only did I stop attaching my self-worth to a man, but I improved my circumstances. I moved out of my brother’s, worked hard at my job and landed a promotion, joined some fitness classes that Amy was taking, spent loads of time with family and friends, and … BAM, that was when I met someone.

 

Honestly, it was the weirdest and most wonderful thing that’s ever happened to me. Since then, I’ve met other women who have found the same thing happened to them: forget men and relationships … improve YOU … and you’ll find the greatest relationship of your life.

 

Don’t let anyone tell you that it can’t be done either. Because I have lived it.

 

If you are in a situation like I was on that spring day, sitting in my car in a parking lot … you can make it out too and find the man of your dreams. Just take my advice. Use the course and don’t attach your worth to men. It’s you who makes the difference.

 

The #1 Thing Awesome Men Love In A Woman (the one they want to commit to)

The #1 Thing Awesome Men Love In A Woman

(the one they want to commit to)

by Nadine Piat

what awesome men love in a woman

Men love a multitude of things about women: their personality, their smile, bodies, feminine features and grace, the way they dress, their hair, the smoothness of their skin, and many, many more things…

 

As much as these are all great attributes that make us uniquely feminine…there is one thing that women often overlook and sometimes even fear, and is the very thing that will attract and keep the best men interested.

 

The best men; men who are ready for love and commitment look for a certain trait in a woman. Of course not all men are exactly the same, since we all have different personalities and desires, but there is one specific characteristic that the best men have in common that gets the relationship ready man, hooked.

 

A man who’s ready to commit to a healthy loving relationship is a man who knows who he is, he’s confident and astute and he’s not scared of his feelings, and these are exactly the character traits he values in a woman.

 

So, no matter how different a man’s taste in women is compared to another, and no matter if he’s English, Irish, American, Australian, Canadian, German or Chinese – they all love…

… A SASSY WOMAN!

 

A man who’s insecure, controlling, unsure of himself, narcissistic and lacks self-worth may be scared of a woman like this. That’s okay. Because the type of man who’s ready to hold you and stand by you through thick and thin will love it.

 

So why do the best men love a sassy woman?

 

Because a healthy man loves a woman who makes him a better man. A healthy man respects a woman who has healthy boundaries. A healthy man will find your confidence and clarity a turn-on.

 

He will go crazy for this side of you.

 

But here’s the bad news, which is actually not news at all: a lot of women are afraid of letting their sassy side shine through. Insecurity is one major reason for this fear, another is the fear of being “too much” or being difficult, or they pay too much attention to the outside, to their appearance.

 

Now, overcoming your insecurities takes time but it’s time well spent. Just remember you are attractive just the way you are, you are smart, beautiful and you deserve the best man. Believe it because it is the truth.

 

How about paying too much attention to appearances? That’s a very common mistake because we all naturally want to look our best for our current or future partner, right? Yet, this perfect appearance we spend so much time and efforts pursuing, is not the most important thing. What’s underneath this appearance is what really matters.

 

You know why? Because the glossy, perfect-looking girls are not taken seriously unless there is some substance under the so-called “perfect look”.

 

The problem is that we often mask our insecurities by trying to look perfect. We forget that the source of sexiness is inside us, not in the makeup kit or the closet. Your personality and your sassy and savvy character traits, make you truly sexy and magnetic.

 

So how do you cultivate your sassiness? How do you shake off this wrong assumption that looking impeccably sexy is the same as being sassy? I’ll start by telling you what sassiness is and is not.

 

1. Sassiness comes from the heart – The sassy woman is fearless and stands tall. She is grounded and heart felt. She may be small in stature or tall, either way, she is noticed by all. She has spunk and a passionate edge.

 

2. A sassy woman will attract men and scare men – A sassy woman attracts men like honey to a bee. Yet she can also repel men just as fast. It’s not because they don’t like the sassiness, in fact it’s quite the opposite.

 

A sassy woman will rattle the core of a man and only the best men are ready for her. At times she will feel confused and wonder what happened, why did he disappear? Well, what happened is that she scared some insecure guy that wasn’t ready for her. She needs to remain strong and sure of herself because the men left standing are just as spectacular as her.

 

3. She is beautifully bold – A sassy woman is direct without being aggressive or demanding. She is not bitchy, though she will at times tell you how she sees something, even when it may be hard to hear. She will be tasteful in her approach and delicate when needed.

 

Personality alone does not define sassiness. You might be somewhat demure or introverted, or you might be as outgoing social butterfly, this does not determine your sassiness. Your authenticity and delivery does. Bitchy women are not sassy, they are mean and largely insecure. You can be cheeky and witty, just do it in an empowering way – this is sassy.

 

Now, here are some tips to cultivate this important quality. It’s really not hard and it’s GOOD for you!

 

1. The Past Is The Past – Dwelling on past mistakes in your romantic life, or even other parts of your life, holds you back, fuels your insecurities, and takes away from your core essence. You can’t let your sassiness bloom when you allow the past to eat away at you, when you doubt yourself, or when you don’t believe that you deserve a loving and connected relationship.

 

A sassy woman wouldn’t settle for some mediocre compromise, nor does she give into unhealthy ways of thinking or let her past define her. When you make peace with your past and realize that you too are deserving of the best that life can give, you organically ignite your sassiness, you’re able to dance and play with life. And hey, there is no such thing as mistakes anyway, so make your past and the “mistakes” work for you, not against you.

 

2. Celebrate Your Body – Feeling comfortable in your own body is a major feature of the sassy woman. I’m sure you’ve seen such women who, regardless of their size or shape, just radiate happiness and the feeling that they are comfortable just as they are. They look really sexy, have you noticed? A sassy woman embraces her full self and also looks after it – she treats her body with love and kindness and a good dose of appreciation and honesty.

 

3. Honor YOU – It all boils down to this, after all. Look after your body and your mind alike. Stay healthy, pamper yourself every once in a while, dress in a way that looks good on you, instead of simply following the latest fad, and stay fit. Try to keep your stress levels manageable, don’t overdo the care-taking, and try to worry less. And smile, smile, smile, any chance you get. A smiling woman is a sassy woman. A sassy woman does not entertain men who are not good for her – she knows what she values and lives by these values. A sassy woman does not go against herself – she honors herself.

 

After reading the above points, can you see the magnetic attributes of the sassy woman? A man who truly wants a partner in life yearns for a woman who has a lovely mix of warmth and gentleness, matched with a good sprinkle of authenticity and edge. He wants a life companion, a woman he can grow and evolve with, not a wallflower or a damsel in distress.

 

Be sassy and delighted with yourself, and you won’t believe how easy it will become to attract the right kind of man.

 

P.S. I’ll actually let you in on a little secret: there are four traits that keep the best men interested. Sassiness is one of them – do you want to know the other three?

 

=> Find out what they are by following THIS LINK. xo