Maybe it’s the guy who delivers your UPS packages, or the barista at your favorite coffee shop.
It could be your friend’s brother-in-law.
Or a guy who works in your office with whom you’ve never shared so much as a “Hi.”
We all develop feelings for people who we don’t “technically” know.
A lot of the time, this is actually where the best relationships sprout.
And sometimes, you might know this person a little. Maybe you’ve shared pleasantries or smiled while walking past each other. Maybe you even know each other’s names through mutual friends but have never actually had a conversation.
The point is, you’ve watched him from afar, and you like what you see.
But now what do you do?
Here are some useful strategies for getting to know this person better and maybe even snagging a date.
How to Get to Know the Mystery Man
- Be there or be square
The first thing to do is be there … where they’re going to see you. If you see this person at the gym, keep going! If you see them at the coffee shop, be there. Being around is the best way to make yourself noticeable and later, get to know him better.
- Put in the work: Recon
Recon, short for reconnaissance. You can do this if you have a mutual friend or possibly know their name. This isn’t stalking, so don’t worry. Since the beginning of romantic relationship time … men and women have been asking the equivalent of “Who is that sexy man/woman over there?” When you want something, it’s ok to put in the effort! Find out hobbies, interests, jobs if you can. Just don’t go too far. FYI: House drive-bys are too far.
- Consult mutual friends
In terms of recon, mutual friends are the best. If you can, however, keep it on the down low that you’re really interested in this person romantically unless you’re sure your friend won’t blab. You want to control the situation.
- Chat ‘em up
Ok, time to make a move. You’re seeing this person regularly. Is there any way to strike up a conversation? Perhaps an, “I really like your gym bag,” or “Do you know what fun things there are to do around here?” Anything to get some chatter going.
- Have a “chance” meeting
Ok, again, do not stalk them, but if you’re seriously into this guy, you have to find a way to get closer to him, so if you know they work as a salesman, and you just so happened to be in charge of purchasing at your office (or whatever), why not make a trip to his store? That sort of thing.
- Just do it
If there’s no way to strike up small talk or prepare a “chance” meeting and no mutual friends, there’s always the “just do it approach.” In other words, walk up to him when you see him … and ask him out. It’s bold, it’s risky, but it just might work!
- Be desirable
Last but not least, you have to be desirable to this man you’re crazy about. He has to want you. We knew you were waiting for this one: Be desirable enough to him, and he’ll seek you out.
Easier said than done, right? Well, actually, it is pretty easy if you know what you’re doing.
The key to being desirable to any man you are attracted to—to truly present to him what he wants and needs in the woman of his dreams—is to first, unlock his guarded heart, and then, reach him on his deepest emotional level as not just a potential mate, but as a man.
Women don’t understand that men process attraction, dating and love completely differently. For example, did you know that men think of creating a romantic relationship in terms of winning and losing? It’s like a sport to them—not in a trivial manner—but in the way they process how it’s going. In other words, they love the action, and they want to see the back and forth as the sport goes on. As you can imagine, as they get closer and closer to their goal, they get more and more excited and aroused by the thought of having you.
If you want to learn more about this concept and how it works, it’s outlined in great detail in The Soul Mate Switch, which—while we’re at it—is the only guide you need if you want to attract this guy and make him immediately ask you out.
The program has worked for hundreds of women who have had feelings for a man they sort of knew, but who they wanted to get closer to. Check it out if you’re ready to start making progress with this guy you have your eye on, and don’t forget the other tips too. There’s no magic potion here, just hard work and some keen information to land the man of your dreams—You really can do it!