Are Bad Past Relationships Hurting Your Chances at True Love?

How Having a String of Bad Past Relationships Is Hurting Your Chances at True Love

 

are you making these unhealthy relationship mistakes

Raise your hand if you’ve never been in a terrible relationship before.

 

Yeah, not many hands.

 

Almost everyone has gone through at least one awful relationship before. And for most of us … there have been more than just one.

 

Try a string of ‘em.

 

We likely remember them all too well. Near the end: The tears, fights, hang-ups, accusations, battles via text message. We’ve had sleepless nights, cried in the bathroom at work … maybe even had a little too much to drink and called our ex—only to hear someone else in the background. Someone who definitely didn’t sound like “just a friend.”

 

Times like this are tough every day. Well, more than that: They’re absolutely terrible.

 

And what’s worse? Well … when it happens time and again.

 

It’s sort of hard not to ask yourself at that point: What’s wrong with me!?

 

But fortunately … eventually … we make the decision that we should get back out there again. Friends tell us. Our moms sit us down. And you probably have more than one conversation with yourself in the mirror: “It’s time. Get back out there.

 

Ok, so great, right?

 

Just one thing.

 

We think we’re ready for future love. We think we’re ready to let the past be water under the bridge.

 

But alas … those awful relationships back there in your past? They haunt you. A terrible relationship from the past is like a pesky ghost. It can so easily deter and prevent you from being open to finding true love in the future.

 

You might like to tell yourself that moving on from a string of bad relationships will be easy and that fully trusting someone again will be simple, but it’s not always quite so easy.

 

One of the main culprits? Murphy’s Law.

 

What’s Murphy’s Law?

 

“Anything that can go wrong, will go wrong.”

 

In other words: “How many times … how many ways … have my past relationships screwed up? Countless. Therefore … it’s bound to happen again.”

 

Simple logic. Yet fortunately for you, a flawed concept. Murphy’s Law doesn’t have to happen.

 

There are ways to move past this idea and come out on the other side ready for a real relationship that won’t be anything like your last ones.

 

How to Move Past the Past and Be Open to True Love Again

 

If you hope to be in a healthy relationship in the future, you may need to take a few key steps to make this happen. Namely, you’ve got to make sure that you don’t self-sabotage or throw away a potentially great relationship.

 

To do this, take the following steps to make sure that you get past these hurdles and move full force into the future.

 

  1. Be open to learning from your mistakes.

 

One reason that many people feel that they are doomed as far as future relationships go is that they assume that if they were the cause (or part of the cause) of past breakups, they’re bound to be the cause of a future breakup as well.

 

The truth is that people break up for many reasons. And yes, it is possible that you were the cause of breakups that happened in the past. But the awesome thing about being human is that you can change if you want to.

 

For example, if you had a relationship in which your partner broke up with you because they said you didn’t listen to them … you can do better this time around.

 

Keep in mind that this scenario only applies to scenarios in which the reason for your past breakup being partly your fault was justified. If your exes labeled you as something you truly weren’t, then that’s not your fault. That’s their fault. Likewise, if what they broke up with you for is not a changeable trait (e.g. They broke up with you because you have a large nose), then of course, that’s not a legitimate reason for someone to break up with you … And screw them.

 

But if you did something that you know caused part of the breakups (and it’s changeable), don’t just double down and keep making the same error over and again (a recipe for failure). Instead, improve and do better this time around.

 

  1. Avoid choosing the same type of person again.

 

If past breakups were caused by the other person being untrustworthy, unreliable or perhaps manipulative or self-centered, by all means, don’t choose the same kind of person again.

 

Naturally, this isn’t as easy as it may sound. You need to look for the warning signs that you should have seen in the past. To understand these warning signs, you have to do some thinking about the beginnings of your last relationship. Were there any red flags that you can see now that you couldn’t see then? Sometimes, it helps to ask close friends or relatives if they saw any red flags. Being wise about traits that are ultimately undesirable in your future partner can help you avoid a terrible relationship in the future.

 

  1. Get your ex out of your life.

 

Finally, make sure that you are moving forward without your exes on the periphery. In this age of social media and in the Internet in general, it’s so easy to continually allow people to be in your life who don’t improve it (and in fact, complicate it).

 

But it’s important to remember that you can curate your social sphere, which means that you can choose to delete your exes from social media. You can also stop staying in contact with them and remove yourself from social circles where you might have to see or talk to them.

 

Many people who have recently broken up with someone find this to be a difficult step to take, but desperate times call for desperate measures. You’ve got to move on.

 

Finding Hope

 

Getting over past breakups and a string of terrible exes is not easy. But it is possible.

 

Take some time to examine those past relationships. See where you can improve yourself and your choice in men or women. Then stop looking back.

 

You’re not going that way.

 

How to “Custom Order” a Soul Mate from the Universe

Why Should You Create a Vision Board for Love?

 

If you are single and looking for long-lasting, soul-stirring, unmistakable L-O-V-E (yes, in all caps) chances are good that you’ve…

  • Tried all sorts of dating sites and apps
  • Met a bunch of Mr. Almost-Rights (and even more Mr. Complete Weirdos)
  • Felt hopeless and frustrated at times
  • Wondered where are all the good men are hiding (the ones annoying people like me keep insisting are out there)

Yet you still hold on to that idea that eventually you will find that one true amazing love, right? I mean, it’s the deep-rooted hope that keeps us going after heartbreak.

And maybe in your attempts to find this wonderful love, you’ve resorted to woo-woo things like psychics, astrology, tarot cards or vision boards.

I did too. Especially vision boards. Man, if George Clooney knew how many photos of him appeared on my vision boards, he’d likely seek a restraining order on me.

But I eventually realized that most vision board practices are pretty useless. Not because George ran off and married that irritatingly gorgeous human rights attorney.

The reason why most vision boards fail when it comes to finding love is because there is really no SUBSTANCE behind them. Slapping up photos of some guy on a bulletin board and thinking that is going to make The One magically appear doesn’t exactly work.

However, when you add thought, intention, and a dash of practicality to the creation of your vision board, it’s a recipe for success. Before we get to that, let’s chat about why vision boards can be a strong tool in your search for love.

 

Why Should You Create a Vision Board for Love?

A vision board is a strong visual reminder of what you desire in a partner and relationship. Having constant reaffirmation of your dreams for love keep you focused on what you want. And helps keep out who and what you DON’T want.

With a vision board you can…

 

Fine-tune the message of who you are hoping to attract.

Especially helpful if you have no problem attracting men yet you can’t seem to attract Mr. Right. As a confident and sexy woman, you probably have zero trouble getting male attention. But you are sick and tired of wasting time with the wrong types. Your vision board cuts through the b.s. and starts attracting the RIGHT ones.

 

Set your intention of the type of relationship you want

Is it one that includes building a family? Or are you at the empty-nest stage where you want a travel companion? It’s not enough to just say you want love, you must lay out in detail the type of relationship and lifestyle you desire with a partner.

 

Break old patterns and habits

Your vision board can chart a totally new course in your love life, breaking you free from the same mistakes and heartaches you’ve experience time and time again. By this point, most of us have realized a lot of our relationships end in the same way. Your vision board clears out that old history and sets the path for a new way of loving.

 

Show gratitude for the love you already have in your life

Like attracts like, joy attracts joy. When you focus on the people and areas in your life that fill your heart, you increase your capacity to receive more of the same. Even if you currently don’t enjoy romantic love.

 

Here is What You Need to Do RIGHT NOW to Get the Universe to Send You Mr. Right

Now that you understand the purpose a vision board serves, it’s time to create one. But you don’t want to create one that doesn’t work.

I mean, if you want to slap up a bunch of pics of George Clooney or even Brad Pitt (he’s single now) on a board and hope for the best, have at it. You will at least enjoy some nice eye candy as you wait with frustration for your soul mate to arrive.

But I think you are ready for more than just waiting around in vain. I think you are ready to take some serious action and tell the Universe that Mr. Right is welcome immediately.

No more Mr. Almost Right. No more Mr. Complete Weirdo.

There is a precise method and mindset that goes into making your vision board work like a personal Magic Genie. It includes the types of images you select and the exact way to arrange them to rev up the law of attraction.

It’s the method I used to attract my amazing boyfriend. When he showed up in my life after I made my vision board, I had to pinch myself to make sure it was really happening.

I’ve created a short video presentation I’d love for you to check out that shows you why most vision boards fail…and how to actually create one that WORKS. From success in love to beyond.

Send a shake-up message to the Universe that you are ready for amazing love and boundless success and check out this quick presentation now.

 

By: Felicity Keith

Candid and sincere, Felicity Keith dishes advice about sex, dating, and relationships with humor and healthy how-to’s. Her work has influenced thousands of women and she is a regular contributor at Digital Romance, Inc.

Dubbed a “suburban Carrie Bradshaw”, she spent years in the dating trenches making every mistake possible…until she finally wised up. In the process, her observations about the inner workings of the male mind resulted in a love-life 180. Now she teaches women how to unleash their inner vixen on their terms and enjoy the love they deserve.

You must learn her

You must learn her.

 

you must learn her

 

You must know the reason why she is silent. You must trace her weakest spots. You must write to her. You must remind her that you are there. You must know how long it takes for her to give up. You must be there to hold her when she is about to.

You must love her because many have tried and failed. And she wants to know that she is worthy to be loved, that she is worthy to be kept.

And, this is how you keep her.

~Junot Diaz

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