He’s Been Cheating. What Should I Do?

You’ve Just Found Out He’s Been Cheating: Here’s What to Do

by Faye Roberts



There’s no doubt about it – being cheated on feels absolutely horrible. No gallon of ice cream or Internet shopping spree can remove the daggers in your heart (not to mention your back). Aside from abuse in a relationship, being cheated on is, for most people, the worst thing one partner can do to the other.


If you have recently found out he’s been cheating, you likely feel betrayed, lost, and alone. In these next moments and days, it is critical that you know what to do—how to handle yourself and keep yourself together.


Friends will offer hugs, gigantic chocolate bars will call out your name, not to mention he might even call out your name when he realizes what a jackass he’s been.


But your goal is to keep yourself together.


Here’s what you need to do to keep yourself sane with your dignity firmly intact.


Cool Off

It doesn’t matter how you found out. Maybe you snooped, maybe he told you, maybe she told you. Whatever the circumstances, take at least a few days to think things through without making contact or accepting any contact from him.


You need this time to gather your thoughts because one of two things is going to happen:

  1. You’ll break it off with him.
  2. You’ll work it out.

If you end up going with the first option, you’ll want to take the high road. Let him be the cheater. You be the classy one, and make a clean and amiable break. You’ll want to move on to greener pastures with a clear conscience.

If you go for the second option and try to work it out, you don’t want to have a belligerent fight and say things you don’t mean in the heat of the moment. So just take the time you need to cool off before you speak with him.


Try Not to Obsess

Once you allow yourself the time to calm down, it’s so important to assess your feelings when your emotions are not high. You need this time to take care of yourself, but you also have to try not to obsess because it can drive you mad.  And guess what? NOTHING good ever has ever come from making assumptions and decisions from obsessive thoughts.


Undoubtedly, you’ll be curious about what went down with the cheating. Who’s the girl? What did they do? How long had it been going on?


First, remember that these are perfectly natural questions to have. And if you truly want the answers, you can ask for them—later. At this point, do your utmost not to let your thoughts run away with you.


If your emotions start snowballing—and they probably will—do your best to pull yourself back to the present moment. If they wander again, don’t criticize yourself. Just return to the present.


To distract yourself, you can try to do some self-pampering things. Head to the spa, have a girls’ night at your place, or try diving into work if that’s what inspires you.


Meet With Him and Have a Conversation

The time to yourself will be well deserved, and hopefully, you’ll have more of a settled mind after you cool off. Now it’s time to talk to your significant other.
You should plan what you want to say and what route you want to take. When you talk with him, be open, and be honest! Say what you mean, and mean what you say. In other words, don’t hold back if you are angry. You deserve to be angry.


With that being said, try to project how you will feel about what you say when it is 6 months from now. You will want to avoid making drastic remarks, such as, “You were never a good boyfriend!” or “You probably cheated with so-and-so, too!”


Stick to what you know, and try to speak with an even tone. It will help you stay calm. There’s no need to be sweet or nice—what he did was bad—but you can still act with dignity.


He will likely want you to hear him out, so try to listen. Ask questions if you want, and take note of his answers.


Either Break it Off or Work it Out—No In-Betweens

 If you knew going into the conversation that this was the end, that is absolutely okay. Tell him what he did was a deal-breaker, and make your way to the exit. But if after your conversation you still need time to think, for heaven’s sake, take it.


If after speaking with him you evaluate the entire situation and decide that maybe you want to work things out, have another conversation with him. During this talk, make it known that you don’t condone his behavior, but you’re willing to try again. If there are other concerns, voice them. If you have stipulations, tell him.  Don’t assume he’ll know what you want. Also listen to what he has to say.


Whatever you do, make a solid choice that you feel works for YOU, and make a commitment to move forward.


Because this is where many women get stuck.

Often, women say they want to work on the relationship, but they don’t recommit. They bring up the cheating time and again even when their recommitted partner is really making an effort. If you want to stay together, do it.  If he is actively trying to work on your relationship, don’t dredge up the past.

Keep in mind that working with a relationship or marriage counselor will greatly facilitate the understanding and healing process in your relationship so that you and your mate can move forward in the healthiest manner possible.  Your relationship is going to need help getting past a betrayal so be proactive in seeking that assistance.


Covet Your Confidence

Last but not least, no matter which way you go—if you stay together or break up—remember to take care of you. Being cheated on feels awful and it can wreak havoc with your self-esteem, but it has nothing to do with your merit as a wonderful person. Remember your strength and confidence, and cherish yourself for who you are.


How to Know if He Really Loves You

Too many times women get love confused with other words and actions from men which make women feel as though their partners love them.  Only that they don’t.

If you’re not sure how he feels, you should definitely watch this video below: How to know if a man really loves you: 7 simple questions that prove how he REALLY feels

how to know if a man really loves you vid

The webinar takes you through 7 simple questions you can ask yourself to let you know if a man really, truly ADORES you or if he’s just using you (even if he doesn’t know it himself) . . .

Watching this presentation might make you feel better about the decisions you are making regarding your partner, or it might make you really sad and angry, but if you want to have a great relationship with a man who honestly truly cares, you NEED to watch it right now.


3 Ways to Create Life-Changing Relationship Abundance

Create Life-Changing Relationship Abundance




Everyone wants to have abundance in life: an abundance of money, friendships, good health, fulfilling work and more. Maybe you have most of that. Maybe you have it all.


But what about your romantic relationship?


How’s that going for you?


Knowing how to create abundance in your romantic life will not only bring you more happiness and joy, but it can also open hundreds of other new doors for you in all aspects of your life.


So if you have ever found yourself fumbling to find or keep a solid romantic relationship that is fulfilling and joyful, this is what you must do.


These are the 3 ways that will turn it all around for you and give you the abundant life you’ve been searching for.


1. Be Your Authentic Self


Sounds easy right? But how many of us are truly our authentic selves around our partners? You try to please them by liking only what they like, acting a certain way around their friends, holding back your true opinions.


This is lying to yourself and the universe. A true and loving partner will love you for you.


Sure, you might not always agree. That’s okay!


And yes, every successful relationship does require some compromise. But this is the thing: when you find yourself hiding things about yourself because you’re scared the other person won’t respond well, you’ve got trouble. You must trust that your partner will appreciate the authentic you. Or else the truth will come out sooner or later, and it might not be good.


Clearly show your true self. Put yourself out there. And don’t be afraid to voice what you really want either. This brings us to the next point.


2. Remember – You Only Get What You Ask For


The Law of Attraction. It states that whatever you want, whatever lights your fire and stirs your desire will come to you … but you have to ask for it.


Seems simple. And it actually is, but not many people take advantage of it.


Think about how many times you got what you wanted from your partner without saying anything. Maybe in bed last night you wanted to try a new position. Or on this particular Tuesday night, your usual Chinese takeout dinner just didn’t sound good, so you wanted Mexican.


Did you get what you wanted by not saying anything? Probably not.


You have to say what you want. Bring it up. Ask about it. Voice your opinion and communicate.


And that goes for everything in your relationship from alone time and sex to money issues and how the living room furniture is arranged. Focus on what you want. Be firm but kind about it. Abundance comes to those who ask.


3. Be Honest About Your Fears


We’ve all got fears. They’re scary and they’re always popping up, but the only way they can actually be harmful is if you try to shove them deep down.


Unacknowledged fears will block you from having an abundant life.


This means you’ve got to talk about them. Be honest about your fears to your partner. Together, you can acknowledge and dismantle them to make way for abundance.


Don’t forget, however, that you also need to let the past go. Fear often stems from re-encountering the same situation and remembering how it turned out the last time. Maybe in the past you were cheated on or abruptly dumped without explanation. Your new partner is not that old one.


Voice your fears and talk about them, but if your current partner has assured you that your fears are unnecessary and unfounded, make sure you drop it. Learn to let go and move on because not doing so could ruin a great relationship.


Finally, cultivate abundance in all areas of your life.


Abundance in your romantic life will help create abundance in other areas of your life as well: money, family, friendships, work, health … the list goes on. But you need those other areas to be abundant so that your love life can thrive as well. Everything works together.


Achieving all of this can be challenging, so if you’re looking for ways to increase overall abundance in your life, make sure that you check out Manifestation Miracle.


This amazing program will open you up to the knowledge and inspiration you need to ultimately live the abundant life you deserve.