Some relationships end because they have to. There are fights and terrible feelings, and both of you want out. Once you end a relationship like this, you probably feel relieved. It’s always a difficult transition, but in this case, you realize it was for the better.
With many other breakups, however, you’re left feeling like you may have made a bad choice. It might be the day after you broke up, the week after … or even months after the relationship came to an end.
Maybe you see him or her, or they just float through your mind and you give them a text out of the blue.
Once you’re on this track, it’s easy to get caught up in your ex’s tangle again, and then you’re left with the big question:
Should you get back with your ex?
It’s a huge question. So first, let’s talk about when you shouldn’t get back with an ex, and we’ll go from there. You should not try to get back with your ex if …
- There was ever any abuse in the relationship
- It was a toxic relationship that made you feel terrible on a regular basis
- They are currently dating someone else or married
If you can say no to all of these things, then there’s a chance this might work. But you also need to truly do some soul searching. Even if the relationship wasn’t TOXIC … it still could have had a lot of bad parts, so you’ll want to make sure you are remembering everything about the relationship and not just the things you want to remember.
For example, did they treat you with respect? Did you two laugh together and have fun a lot? Were you friends as well as romantic partners?
Were the things they did that annoyed you small (like leaving dishes in the sink) or serious (like cheating or taking advantage of you)? Were the fights you got in long and horrible? How often did they happen?
Imagine yourself in a relationship with this person right now. You’re going to go right now and meet them for a drink. You’re going to wake up in the morning next to them. How do you feel?
Now that you’ve thought about the good times and the bad … if you are still erring on the side of wanting them back … here’s what to do.
4 Reasons You Should Get Back With Your Ex
Out of those couples who have broken up and successfully gotten back together only to live a happily ever after story, these are usually the reasons that the reunion worked.
- Your priorities have changed.
Maybe you were dead set on never having kids way back when. Or maybe you thought marriage was not your thing. Now that some time has passed, your priorities may have shifted. And if that’s the case, now you might be more in line with the person you used to love.
- You’ve spent time apart, and realized they’re still what you want.
If you’ve been broken up for a significant amount of time, say, a few years, you’ve probably dated in that time. Maybe you’ve dated a lot. Maybe just a little. Regardless, if you’ve put yourself out there and tried a few new partners on for size without luck … it’s a sign that you’re now thinking about your ex. Maybe they are who you’re truly meant to be with.
- The timing was off last time.
This one is a definite yes to getting back together. Were you two meeting each other in passing last time? Now that you’re both in a similar place, you could be able to make it work.
- You’ve both grown up.
Finally, sometimes relationships don’t work simply because one or both of you haven’t fully matured yet. This does not mean we are only talking about relationships that involve high school or college kids. Even those in their 30s, 40s and beyond can be “immature.” Sometimes, it takes some time apart to grow up before you can actually know what’s good for you.
Now … How Do You Get Your Ex Back?
If you’ve decided that you have a good reason to get back together with your ex, great. You’ve thought about this decision and realized that the reason you broke up in the first place was not dire enough to keep you apart.
But how do you get them back?
Well, let’s start with step one: You need to get in contact with them if you aren’t already. Send them a text or a message on social media. Reach out and see how they feel about you. You might even take the time to apologize if the relationship ended badly.
But once that first step is made, there’s still more work to do. The Ex Factor Guide is great at helping couples who are truly meant to be find each other again and rekindle the romance. If you know that you need to get back together but your ex doesn’t realize what’s going on, Ex Factor Guide can help get you two where you need to go.
In the end, deciding whether or not you should get back together with your ex should can be a struggle, but if you look deep inside to see what your true feelings are, you’ll have the answer right in front of you.