You’re out with your boyfriend and your best friend is there. Sure, you hope they get along … but are they getting along a little too much?
Is he touching her arm … Is she touching his thigh? Are they laughing and gossiping and sharing funny stories? Do you feel like the third wheel instead of her?
If these are the initial reactions you’re having, it might be cause for concern. But taking action needs to be done carefully and cautiously. Follow these guidelines for the best outcome, which is that you retain your relationship and your friendship, and no one feels awkward.
How to Approach Possible “Flirtations” Between Your Guy and Your Friend
First, are you just jealous? Make sure they’re actually flirting.
In a situation like this, you have to make sure that you aren’t just being jealous. In order to ensure that, first take a look at your past. Have you ever had this scenario happen to you before with nothing to come of it? If so … this might be a running theme.
If it helps, (in a secure place), write down all the things that have made you feel like your friend and guy have been flirting. If it includes things like them laughing at the same jokes, talking, and making eye contact, try to take a beat and realize that that’s just two friendly people interacting.
If the list includes things like them meeting to hang out without you, touching each other a lot, and completely barring you from their conversation when you’re all together … take this seriously.
Sure they’re flirting? Talk to your guy.
Alright, if it’s cause for concern, you need to bring this issue up with both your best friend and your man. First, talk to your man. This is because you two are in the relationship that you are worried about. Of course, you’re worried about your friendship too, but a line has been crossed that should be especially firm within your romantic relationship. So take the plunge and talk to him about it.
Make sure you approach it gently, and just be honest. Tell him how much you care about and love him and your friend, but make it known that you think their interactions have been a little weird … and you’re uncomfortable.
Now, if necessary, talk to your friend.
If he is generally saying that most of the flirtations are coming from your friend’s end, you’ll need to talk to her as well. Make sure that isn’t just pushing it all on her though. Use your noggin. You know what you’ve seen between them.
In some cases, however, girls can be a little more flirtatious than is welcome (men can too), so if your boyfriend says that he actually feels uncomfortable too, bring it up (again, gently) with your friend. Be casual about it, but make it known that it makes you feel uncomfortable. Don’t bring up that you’ve talked about it with your guy. And definitely don’t have a three-way conversation about it. You don’t want to build this into a drama.
In the best case scenario, both your guy and best friend will acknowledge what’s going on, beg your pardon, and make an effort to tone down the flirting.
But you have some work to do within your relationship as well.
Identify the “Gap”
Almost all relationships will develop the dreaded Gap at one point or another. In fact, most relationships have this Gap for most of their relationship, and it just keeps widening and shrinking as the months, years and decades pass.
It’s the communication Gap, and it becomes glaringly present whenever you two are feeling like you’re not connected on that intense romantic level. When you feel deep in your heart that your guy is actually, truly flirting with someone else? Your so-called friend? That’s the Gap getting wider … and wider. Let it get too wide, and it’s over.
To bridge the gap, you need to know what your man desires deep down. And this is where you need a program, such as Be Irresistible. There are many programs women use to bridge the Gap and get super close with their men again, but Be Irresistible is constantly number one on the list, so we’ll only mention this one.
With this program, you can enjoy a rare sort of relationship, one that is exciting, romantic, passionate and incredibly vivacious.
But remember, it all starts by taking the proper course of action. If you are seriously worried about your man with another woman (your friend, no less), you need to take these action steps now. That is, unless you are prepared to see those two walking down the aisle in a few years.
No one ever criticizes someone who going after what they truly want in terms of career or financial goals. So why should you hold back on what you want romantically?
If your relationship is in jeopardy, go out there and get him back, girl! Make him crazy about you again. It’s possible. He’s worth it. And so are you.